Resolutions 2018

Last year's resolutions was a classic example of my tendency to over engineer. I walked into it knowing that it was all probably too much, but really it was a beautiful arrangement of category and subcategory. I find that kind of organization very appealing, but it's difficult to follow through on something like that. So, this year is hopefully going to be a simplification:

1. Reading Goal: 150 total books, 50 of which need to not be YA. I'm still trying to read 100 YA books a year, but let's face it that's just going to happen. The bigger issue is getting in the other stuff. So, I'm going to read the YA, but my focus is going to be getting in the nonfiction, professional reading, and non-YA fiction.

2. Apply to Grad School. 'Nuff said. I got my certification renewed which was the project for 2017, so it's time to work on the grad school thing.

3. Eliminate Kitchen Waste By Spoilage. Sources vary somewhat, but the average American family wastes about $1,500 of food a year. (The estimates range from about $1300 - $2100) While I suspect that my family is probably a bit under the average for food waste, I know that we do waste food and it's mainly through bad planning and laziness. So for a year, my focus is going to be on cleaning up those habits. No ordering takeout when there's food at home that needs cooking and no ignoring leftovers because I don't feel like eating it. As a sub issue, it's probably past time that I set up my composter. We are a veggie heavy family and those trimmings could be put to better use.

4. Writing. This is the one area where I'm going to let myself get a little complicated because it is important to me.:

• The Blog - 1 post every day and every book I read gets a post. I got pretty sloppy with it last year and I'd like to avoid a repeat.
• School Blog - Launch and maintain the school focused version of the blog.
• Daily Writing Habit - Write every day and begin working on creative writing projects. I'm not sure how to organize this yet, but I am stating it as a goal.

It's still a lot to work on, but it's less rigid. Wish me luck.

Scythe by Neal Shusterman

I have to admit, I've been lusting after this book since I saw the cover art a year ago. Books shouldn't be about good cover design but sometimes the right cover art does half the work of promoting. What can I say, sometimes I can be a little shallow. My usual modus operandi is to wait for a used copy to come along, but when it won a Printz Award Honor, I knew my wait was going to be a long one. Eventually, I caved and bought a new copy when I saw it on sale.

To be clear, I'm a fan of people buying new books. Really, I am. That's how authors make their livings, however new books are often priced in such a way that it simply isn't feasible to buy my reading load new, which is a shame. Assume that I read 120 books. If each book costs a minimum of $10 on average new (most are much more), than I'm looking at a minimum of $1,200 a year. That's a lot of money. Now granted, I'm in the top few percentiles for books read in a year, but it still makes me wonder at the cost of the books themselves especially in the case of digital media which is not resalable. I wonder if the cost of new books were less, would people read (or at least buy) more of them? It's not a question I have an answer for, but I do think digital copies should cost less than they do.

Anyway, I digress.

Scythe is about a far future where humanity has solved most of it's social ills. No poverty or starvation. There is no war because there are no national governments and everything is controlled and maintained by an AI. There is very little crime and no sickness or, in fact, naturally caused death. The biggest problem humanity has is stagnation, and they are stagnating.

This world still has problems, of course. In order to stem the explosion of population and fight against some of the stagnation, there are a group of people called scythes who deal out death to the otherwise immortal. While they are terrifying figures, they are also highly regarded. In some ways it feels reminiscent of the medieval orders of knights. All high ideals and susceptible to corruption.

Two youths, Citra and Rowan, are chosen to be apprentice Scythes and quickly get wrapped up in events bigger than themselves.

This was a quick read appropriate for High School. There are a lot of philosophical ideas hidden in here about the nature of mortality and its influence on human creativity. Also, big themes on the nature of power to corrupt.

Books for the Break

So, since these breaks are some of my most solid times for reading, let's do a list. ( I love lists) Specifically, I have a lot of other people's books at the moment and I really should get them back. I also have gotten in the way of several of my students by accidentally holding books hostage.

1. Fledgling by Octavia E. Butler (Dad)
2. Bad Unicorn by Platte F. Clark (Sasha)
3. Gym Candy by Carl Deuker (Library)
4. Paper Towns by John Green (Library)
5. The Power of Six by Pittacus Lore (Student Waiting)
6. The Rise of Nine by Pittacus Lore (Student Waiting)
7. The Fall of Five by Pittacus Lore (Student Waiting)
8. The Revenge of Seven by Pittacus Lore (Student Waiting)
9. The Fate of Ten by Pittacus Lore (Student Waiting)
10. United as One by Pittacus Lore (Student Waiting)
11. Sold by Patricia McCormick (Jessica)
12. I'll Give you the Sun by Jandy Nelson (Library)
13. Protector of the Small: First Test by Tamora Pierce (Jessica)
14. Protector of the Small: Page by Tamora Pierce  (Jessica)
15. Protector of the Small: Squire by Tamora Pierce (Jessica)
16. Protector of the Small: Lady Knight by Tamora Pierce (Jessica)
17. Trickster's Choice by Tamora Pierce (Jessica)
18. Tricksters Queen by Tamora Pierce (Jessica)
19. "Reading Don't Fix No Chevys" by Michael Smith & Jeffry Wilhelm (Professional Library)
20.  "You Gotta Be the Book" by Jeffrey D. Wilhelm (Professional Library)
21. Every Thing, Every Thing by Nicola Yoon (Bella)

These are the books that I really should get through for one reason or another, but even if I read a book a day, I'll still be working on them into January.

A Reflection

As we close into the end of the year, I can  safely say that I failed every single one of my 2017 goals save one. I did read over 100 YA novels. (yay me!) Overall though, I will probably finish up somewhere around 123 books (give or take a couple), almost all of them YA, only one nonfiction and about five or so books of poetry....specifically novels in verse. Sometime around August the blog started to seriously lapse, and I had a hard time starting back up, though I did try several times. Any other sort of writing went right off the table almost from the word go. So yeah, that adds up to a hard fail on stated goals.

In the past, when something like this has happened I've restarted the blog and wiped the slate clean. I have been seriously considering doing that again, but in the end I think I will hold on to the tainted past and forge ahead. We are, after all, ultimately defined by our pasts and I don't want to be the kind of person who shies away from looking at where I've been.

So here I am.

Some years, I think, we change more than in others. We do more growing and more reflecting. I feel like this has been one of those years for me. (Which is probably why I failed so many of my stated goals lol) I've really grown into the sense of myself as a mother even though there are still times I find it overwhelming and alien. I've also really started to feel like a teacher in the core of my being. The transition to department head has been a bit fraught more in the sense of identity than anything else. It was rather alarming to discover how little it actually felt like a change. It's like I grew up sometime when I wasn't looking and had to get to know the adult me.

I think my mother would say I was always the adult me, even when I was a kid.

So, looking forward. I'm in the process of formulating goals for 2018. My priorities have shifted, no doubt, but I suspect they will still have many similarities to previous years. I believe I am going to create an offshoot of this blog that is mostly crosspostings of the book reviews/reflections that I can post directly to my classroom pages for the use of my students.  I don't know how that will evolve, but I don't intend to post anything there that hasn't been posted here.

Thus ends "The State of the Lydia" for 2017

The Seer of Shadows by Avi

There is something fun about a good ghost story. A ghost is a kind of puzzle in literature. They represent unfinished business and hidden nefarious deeds. I love it. It's a little strange to me that they've fallen out of vogue, but I haven't seen too many written just lately. This one, by Avi, is set during the height of spiritism's popularity in 1872 New York City.

Horace Carpetine is fascinated by the science of photography. Accordingly, this enterprising 14 year old gets himself apprenticed to a somewhat dubious photographer: Mr. Middleditch. Mr. Middleditch is lazy but also a good teacher. Horace learns to set up the glass plates and how to develop the negatives and prints. In fact the only thing he hasn't learned to do is snap the shots himself.

All this changes when a high society lady in mourning appears to arrange a photograph of herself for her dead daughter's grave. Mr. Middleditch immediately develops a plan using double exposures to create the image of the daughter's ghost. A hoax, in short.

Things quickly get out of hand and there is more going on than it appears. Are the images a hoax, or a real ghost after all?

This was a good, fast paced book. Chapters were short and first person narration helped the creation of suspense. While this is clearly a ghost story primarily, it also tackles some of the contemporary issues surrounding slavery.

Month of Tamora Pierce

I had a bit of reading dry spell during my absence but broke it in early October when one of my co-workers loaded up my desk with 11 Tamora Pierce books. I generally think highly of Jess's taste in YA and since a student saw the books on my desk and got excited, I decided to break through my dry spell. I finished the last of the 11 early this morning.

Over all, I think Pierce writes good fantasy-based YA.What I read fell into three series all set in the same world. While she includes some gritty elements here and there, mostly it falls into a standard girl oriented format.

Beka Cooper Series

1. Terrier
2. Bloodhound
3. Mastiff

This series follows the deeds of Beka Cooper whose highest aspiration is to be a "Dog" or city guard. She was born in slums of Corus and can hear the spirits of the dead who linger on the backs of pigeons. This series, of the three I read, included the most gritty realism. Pierce does a good job describing a medieval city slum. Unlike the rest of the series, each of these books almost read like a thriller/mystery with all the action revolving around Beka's investigations. There is intrigue and betrayal and a talking cat of dubious origins. Good stuff.

Song of the Lioness Series

1. The First Adventure
2. In the Hand of the Goddess
3. The Woman Who Rides Like a Man
4. Lioness Rampant

 This series picks up at least 100 years after the Beka Cooper series. In fact, Beka's several times grandson turns up as one of the main secondary characters. In this series, it's been a long time since there were any lady knights, but Alanna Trebond is determined to avoid her fate as pampered noble lady. She disguises herself as a boy and joins page training at the palace. Over the course of the series she becomes a knight and then a hero. She has several love affairs, which are tastefully handled by Pierce. This series features a lot of court intrigue. While Alanna isn't a blundering warrior type, she's not exactly a deep thinker either. It's a solid series, but I wish there were more of the intrigue angle.

Immortals Series

1. Wild Magic
2. Wolf-Speaker
3. Emperor Mage
4. The Realms of the Gods

This is the series I actually started with. It takes place soon after the events described in "Song of the Lioness" and follows a character named Daine who is a young woman with a secret. The resolution of this secret accounts for most of the first novel so I won't say much. Suffice it to say, there is more than one kind of magical ability in this world and Daine has one of the more rare and unusual. All of Pierce's series seem to feature animal companions, but this series is practically infested with them. This series also opens the door for more magical critters which is an interesting expansion.

Update

It's been a long time, at this point, since I've written. Part of it is that I've been busy, but a bigger piece of it is that I've been very unsettled of late. So here's what is happening.

1. I feel a lot of pressure, both internal and external, to figure out what I'm doing with my life, particularly in the sense of furthering my education. I'm stuck in a bit of motivation soup. I like many things about my job, so I'm not sure why it can't 'just be enough.' However, every time I think I've convinced myself of that, I get this anxiety linked up with a sense of moving forward, or not as the case may be. Now, part of that is money, teachers don't get paid much, but it's a livable wage. At my school, any way, moving up to admin wouldn't necessarily be much of an increase in my pay check at all. Moving up to admin would also mean a step away from the kids and one of the things I've known for a while, it's not the teaching I love, it's helping these kids, this demographic. Additionally, I'm not sure I really want to deal with the headaches inherent in being admin. To make it worse, that means going back to school for my M.ed. and trying to balance that with job and life just in order to move into a job that I'm not sure I want. However, if I don't move in that direction, I can't think of any other move that would be worth the risk and anxiety. My ambition towards writing always raises its head at this point, but I'm not a fool enough to think that is anything but a pleasant dream. Even if I could get my writing habit back and find the time, there's little likelihood that I could make any money at it. So, there I'm stuck on that issue.

2. I'm feeling a lot of anxiety about Thomas's daycare. Not to get into it too deeply, I just don't trust them to give me the information that I need to make plans. They've already held him back into the 2/3 room on the basis of potty issues. They sprang that on us even though I expressed concerns many times over the previous year and even made plans over the summer on the basis that they were working on it with him, only find out two weeks before the change over that they had not been. They had many opportunities to talk to us about it and didn't. In fact they handled it very poorly when I expressed frustration. So the longer he lingers in the this room, the longer I worry that we are facing a similar experience when he needs move into pre-K. He's making progress on the potty front, but I have no idea what their standard for moving him into the 3/4 room is and don't feel like I can talk to them about it based on how they responded to the previous issue. Everyone I've tried to ask has been absurdly vague. I don't want to move him to a new daycare while he is making progress with the potty but I also don't want him missing the intellectual stimulation he needs. I feel like there's no good choice.

So, that's mostly what's going on. I have so much of this stuff whirling around, that I'm having a hard time coming up with public writing for the blog. However, I suspect that's actually making the anxiety worse, so I'm going to try to get the blog going again.

Sorry to natter on.